Underlying Issues

​To really know a woman is to know them from within and not just what you see on the outside. You may think that you know everything about her but truth is you never really know them completely. There is always a part of each woman that is not known by many; it is locked away in a safe and only opens up to worthy individuals. 

So you meet a woman and you’re getting to know each other. You hang out a couple of times, you talk to each other constantly, and she laughs at your jokes. You have a good connection overall. You might think man this is going pretty good. I might actually have a shot with her, not the drinking kind but would have been nice too.

You get to the point where you need to do something about what you are feeling before it becomes an issue. So you tell her confidently how you feel and you get hit with the.. I see you as a friend or the I’m not ready for anything serious. It’s basically every guy’s worst nightmare. As a guy you might immediately think ohh she’s playing hard to get and wants me to put in work that is not always the case. 

Sometimes it’s so easy to judge a book by their cover without knowing their underlying issues. In other words you don’t know what they are dealing with. They might be happy on the outside but who knows what’s going on inside. You know how they say women don’t need to be understood, only loved. Well I think that’s looking at things one-sided. There is always two sides of a story. Perhaps they need to be understood to some extent to know where they are coming from. They might have their reasons for not wanting anything serious.

Perhaps a relationship is out of the question because they need to fix those underlying issues. They could also be playing it safe or they truly see you as a friend. It is also girl code for not interested. Get the memo. Or simply put there is just no attraction, face it attraction plays a major factor in getting to know someone. Sometimes you have to read between the lines and don’t get it twisted. The worst thing you can do is ruin a good friendship over feelings. Don’t worry if you did, I’ve done it in the past, it just serves as a lesson that you just can’t make someone see you the way you see them.

You can handle this one of two ways. You can either accept the situation, be their friend and stick around. Just because they don’t see you with the same eyes doesn’t mean you should go and change, girls have a sixth sense and they know when that happens. So don’t go changing and don’t drop off the face of the earth either.

Or you can do something about the situation. If you truly can’t be friends be upfront and tell them that being friends might not be a such a good idea. They might or might not understand. Sometimes you have to be honest and true to yourself. 

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